Kill me. It wouldn't help. The human body is capable of being flatulent for hours after death.

杀了吧 没用的 人体能在死亡数小时内一直制造气体。

Yes, I'd rather be cared for by a flatulent helper monkey.

宁要一只猴子来。

It's nothing personal. I'd just prefer if my future niece or nephew didn't become flatulent every time they ate an eskimo pie.

不是故意针对你。只是不想未来的侄子侄女一吃紫雪糕就胃胀气。

Meanwhile, me, I was making money in the USA, but the closest thing I had to a friend was the flatulent co-worker I took my cigarette breaks with.

与此同时， 在美国赚钱，但最亲近的朋友是和一起抽烟的那位吹气的同事。